Moms don’t take sick days

You may already know this, but moms don’t take sick days. Growing up I remember my mom taking a sick day once (it may have been more than that but it’s unlikely).  She had a migraine and images-2shut the bedroom door (shut the door!  Whoa.  Serious stuff there). I believe she said something like “Do not open the door unless the house is on fire!” and she also instructed my sister and me to be quiet in such a way that we were silent for the entire day.

 The past extended holiday weekend my family had the flu.  This includes me because I am part of said family. On Friday I felt fine. I went shopping with my mother and sister and I didn’t feel great, but I just chalked it up to a 2,000 calorie lunch.  It seemed like a good idea at the time. I even went to the gym and worked out…hard.  On Saturday I went to the gym early and felt worse as the day wore on but not sick. My husband was sick. I quarantined him in the bedroom. Throughout the day I felt progressively less swell and at one point I laid down on the floor with the little one and fell asleep watching The Gilmore Girls on Netflix. I was unable to admit I had succumbed. I thought I had simply worked out too hard two days in a row.

By Sunday I was toast. And here are the things that also happened while I was toast: I walked the dog, went to the coffee shop (I hope you didn’t get sick there, if you did sorry. I was in sick denial), the gym, PetCo (they had a sale and I got $20+ back), laundry, set up new aquarium, laundry, walked the dog, laundry, and laundry. The icing on the cake is that during this whole episode I also feed the kiddo every 3 hours or so which meant prying myself out of a warm blanket on the couch (you know so I didn’t get sick from quarantined husband in the bedroom) a few times at night.  This was especially cruel because last week he strung together a couple of 6 hours sleeps in such a fashion that I was sure he was on a roll. He was not. I should’ve never washed those lucky PJs.

I don’t say this to brag. I was honestly in denial and that’s why I think moms never take sick days.  There is always so much to do and if I’m awake every three hours well then I might as well get at it. On the other hand it will all still be there tomorrow!

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Exercise can be ugly

There are lots of benefits to exercise. Scientifically, it’s good for your heart and brings you longevity over non-exercisers.  Realistically, exercise helps me kick ass, stay sane, and makes me happy.  But there are some down sides to exercise. It’s not always fun and it doesn’t always feel good while you are doing the workout.

For instance if you’re a runner and shoes don’t fit, or your socks don’t have enough cushion, or if you play soccer and someone steps on your toes, then your toenails could bruise and eventually fall off.  You will live.  It’s happened to me a number of times.  Nail polish was invented for this reason. I’m quite sure of it.

Chafing.  It happens.  Those new shorts that you were excited to wear on a long run might actually be sewn together with fishing line or so it seems after mile 5.  And those squats that give you crazy power may also make you legs rub in way they didn’t last year.  The worst part about chafing is the silent scream you will do in the shower when you’re done with the workout.

It’s possible that at some point you will lift so heavy or run so long or bike so far that it may hurt to walk down stairs or to walk period. While this isn’t a normal thing for me it does happen after my first long run of the season.  Ow, ow, ow, ow.

There is a point in every workout where that smell just follows you and you realize that the smell is actually you!  You will stink if you’re working hard.  Twenty four hour deodorant is a lie (I wrote about this last week https://distractosquirrel.wordpress.com/2015/05/05/lies-we-are-told-part-1/).x354-q80

While bruises, scratches, cuts, scrapes and turf burn are all part of the game, there will be games (of any sort) that may include the following: catty shirt pulling, swearing (infinitely louder in adult sports), and pushing.  Then you’ve got to go tell your stupid stupid opponent what a great job they did in the name of sport when you really wish you had this shirt. —>

So that’s what no one tells you about exercise.  One last thing is that it is all worth it.  The broken nose, the sweat dripping in your eyes (BTW never put sunscreen on your forehead if you are planning to sweat — I learned that the hard way), finishing a half hour behind your friends.  It’s all worth it and I wouldn’t change a thing.