You may already know this, but moms don’t take sick days. Growing up I remember my mom taking a sick day once (it may have been more than that but it’s unlikely). She had a migraine and shut the bedroom door (shut the door! Whoa. Serious stuff there). I believe she said something like “Do not open the door unless the house is on fire!” and she also instructed my sister and me to be quiet in such a way that we were silent for the entire day.
The past extended holiday weekend my family had the flu. This includes me because I am part of said family. On Friday I felt fine. I went shopping with my mother and sister and I didn’t feel great, but I just chalked it up to a 2,000 calorie lunch. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I even went to the gym and worked out…hard. On Saturday I went to the gym early and felt worse as the day wore on but not sick. My husband was sick. I quarantined him in the bedroom. Throughout the day I felt progressively less swell and at one point I laid down on the floor with the little one and fell asleep watching The Gilmore Girls on Netflix. I was unable to admit I had succumbed. I thought I had simply worked out too hard two days in a row.
By Sunday I was toast. And here are the things that also happened while I was toast: I walked the dog, went to the coffee shop (I hope you didn’t get sick there, if you did sorry. I was in sick denial), the gym, PetCo (they had a sale and I got $20+ back), laundry, set up new aquarium, laundry, walked the dog, laundry, and laundry. The icing on the cake is that during this whole episode I also feed the kiddo every 3 hours or so which meant prying myself out of a warm blanket on the couch (you know so I didn’t get sick from quarantined husband in the bedroom) a few times at night. This was especially cruel because last week he strung together a couple of 6 hours sleeps in such a fashion that I was sure he was on a roll. He was not. I should’ve never washed those lucky PJs.
I don’t say this to brag. I was honestly in denial and that’s why I think moms never take sick days. There is always so much to do and if I’m awake every three hours well then I might as well get at it. On the other hand it will all still be there tomorrow!
I had a son a couple of weeks ago. I’ve been busier and more tired than I ever thought possible, but right this second he’s sleeping peacefully. I’ve been cried at, pooped and spit up on and I wouldn’t change a bit of it…not for the world. There any many things I thought I understood about having and raising a child and there are some things that instantly became clear once he joined the world. Here are a few of them.
If you have a birth plan, burn it or throw it out the window. Your kiddo has a plan too and it’s unlikely the same plan. I planned to give birth at a birth center with a midwife and ended up in the hospital with severe preeclampsia. It happens. In my opinion, the best thing that you can do is educate yourself about all options available and be flexible. In fact, I am learning that being flexible is an essential part of this parenting thing.
I know that my son is crying. I hear him while I’m shopping too. I don’t want him to cry either, but I’m not going to find a bench to feed him and then resume grocery shopping in a half hour. Someday we may be skilled enough to breastfeed in the Moby wrap. We’re not there yet. I’m just going to get my hustle on so I can remove myself from the scene. No need to glare at me people. I need milk and tater tots and I’m not leaving without them. Deal with it!
There are lots of rules/suggestions/guidelines with babies and you have to choose your own path. You should remain yourself only now you have a baby. I thought I read enough books and articles and blog posts, but there is always something to learn and everyone has an opinion. Do you know that some people don’t leave the house with babies? What?! I’d go bonkers! But that’s me. In the first week with my son I was in a wedding and went to the state fair. See? I’m still me. I go, go, go. Granted that was a crazy week and we have settled into a pattern now that doesn’t involve that level of precise timing. I’m most likely not going to wrench him out of bed to run errands (notice I didn’t say never). My sister told me that while she was home with her baby she only planned on doing two things a day. Recently I took the kiddo to a union protest and now he’s sleeping in his union red onesie. I don’t think I’ll be doing anything else today. Bottom line: everyone has opinions and you have to learn how to parent in your own style. If it doesn’t work for you, then it doesn’t really work, does it?
I’m always late or there is the potential to be late for any appointment, meeting, or gathering. My husband and I joke that we are always one diaper blow out away from being late. It’s true. You can’t plan that.
I can’t make plans much or rather I don’t make solid plans. My plans are today I will go to the chiropractor. The office is open for 6 hours today. I’ll make it at some point before or after I walk the dog or I won’t.
While I love my child I also savor the moments that he’s with someone else. Sometimes it’s fun to be lost in my not so recently left behind adult world where people are loud with laughter (without apology because they are worried they will wake the kidd0) and don’t ask me baby things.